Need Help?

When Do you ACTUALLY need a Coach?

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Right?! You have it all figured out.

Your relationship is fine.

Yeah.. you bicker and such but, she/he, or they, are both happy enough.. right?

As long as you look happy on the socials… right…

What even is enough?

Is there more? More fulfillment… more bliss. Are all the “things” we “know” about relationships truly real? Where did these ideas come from about relationships?

Here’s my take:

Our ideas in this society, on romantic relationships and love in general, is a lot like a candied apple. 🍎

You have the gleam of the relationship and it just looks so shiny! And unattainable. Up there just out of your reach…

When/if you get it, you get to taste the delectable coating. Maybe rolled in some caramel and coated in nuts and chocolate chips… that’s how most relationships start because… each person is acting on their best behavior.

Then you bite into the candy apple.. and it’s not at all your fav! You like sour apples 🍏 and this is a slightly soft and rotten apple.. with a worm 🐛!!!

I digress.

And you get my point, I hope. It’s not at all a fairy tale. Although the apple had you huh?

You received your programming on what a relationship should be from your mom/dad/caregiver/religion/media and movies 🍿 What did they impact on you?

I grew up watching Beauty and the Beast. Wanting to have freedom like Ariel in The Little Mermaid …And let me tell you… wanting to be saved so badly by the Prince from the Frog in Thumbelina.

So as a result, I thought men should act like a mysterious character, probably not stay committed, and save me after I got harassed by a frog. 🐸

No, thank you…

Ok, so when we find out it’s not a fairy tale / not like the movies, we what?

Ghost… 👻

It’s not you… it’s me… 🗡️

We just don’t have that spark ⚡️

_____ fill in any other that you have heard/said/received, please 🙏

Some of us… ahh … yes.. we get it! We want what is real. Tangible. Authentic. We know a secret… 🤫 when we get older it’s not about the things we have done or how much money we have.. it’s real love that matters.

So… what happens when THOSE relationships hit a speed bump and they need a realignment?

Who do you call… haha no, not ghostbusters.

People who know what to do. Relationship therapists and coaches.

In many ways, researching and connecting with a relationship coach may feel like… a failure? Like… something is wrong and WE cannot fix it ourselves?! Or perhaps, “we would never!” -clutching pearls-

In reality, many people do reach out and connect with coaches all the time. Intimacy coaches for activities that they want to learn to really dive into their sexual lives and discover new and intriguing things together… exploring each other.. both learning.

And what if I told you the same thing is for intimacy as it is for relationships. Relationships don’t just occur.. they take conscious decisions about agreements and commitments. And recommitting over and over again when you start to drift away from that commitment. Among other things 😉 But that’s a whole other post for another time, dear ones.

So what causes that shift or drift?

When it comes to relationships and drifting away; there comes a time when you start feeling an inner tug…a sort of quiet yet insistent knowing that what’s happening on the surface isn’t telling the whole story.

You might find that the same old arguments are coming back, or that there's an unspoken disconnection despite the care you still hold for each other. It’s not always a dramatic breakdown; rather, it might feel like you’re living with an undercurrent of tension or a subtle emptiness that you can’t quite shake off.

You may notice that, despite best efforts, you’re caught in a cycle. A cycle of minor issues that spiral into larger patterns and larger arguments…moments of disconnection when you really want to be fully present. Or, an unexplained sense of being stuck that leaves both of you feeling drained.

There's an inner voice hinting at untapped potential, a call from deep within that you’re not living from your most authentic, connected self.

In many ways, reaching out for a relationship coach can also feel like standing on the threshold of transformation.

You’re Afraid

You’re experiencing a mix of discomfort and anticipation…like the bittersweet sensation of knowing that something cherished is slipping away, even though you also see the possibility for a deeper intimacy on the other side of that vulnerability. It’s as if you recognize that there are unseen barriers at work, limits that neither of you consciously chose but that have nonetheless begun scaffolding your interactions.

When you feel this way…a mix of persistent discontent, the nagging knowledge of untapped potential, and even a bit of fear about truly opening up…it’s a sign that a relationship therapist/coach might just be the trusted guide you need.

It’s an invitation to step into radical honesty and make a conscious choice to explore not only the external dynamics but the inner landscapes that shape them.

Ultimately, it will feel like a call to move beyond the familiar, to challenge old patterns and to embrace the possibility of a more vibrant, soulful connection. That subtle, inner beckoning…the mix of anxious resignation and hopeful craving for something deeper…is exactly what signals that the time is right to seek support and guidance in your relationships.

So I hope that you do find support my readers and fellow writers… because true authentic stories of love …do really exist. And those are tales worth telling.

With all of the love ❤️

Diary of a Relationship Coach

Click* to access my new paid subscribers list as I will be doing something new and exciting. From here on, my existing paid subscribers + new paying subscribers will have access to my latest 💡 Teaching workshops on relationships, sexuality and intimacy, and conscious living. These will be available virtually and or live.

These ideas are fresh out of the oven and rawthentic … they will be honest conversations between you and I as I answer qs with activities and tips. Stay tuned.